Day Sixty Eight
My whole life I thought meditation was something other people did. I saw all the apps, got all the Youtube recommendations, even went to some temples and wanted what the spiritual examples there had, and still thought it was something elusive and impossible.
Meditation meant sitting with myself. Meditation meant not judging myself on my productivity. Meditation meant losing control and allowing rather than doing. All those reasons why I couldn’t feel capable of meditation became the very reasons I needed to do it.
I thought I would have to sit for 30 minutes and perfectly perform the art of mindfulness, when in reality my meditation ritual started with just setting aside five minutes to allow myself to sit quietly, to notice and recognise – then sit with that in a position of neutrality. It slows my day down, it centres me, and it gives me key information as to where my mind is today. I often thought I didn’t have time for meditation, but in reality meditation afforded me more time, because it could slow my day down. Meditation is just training our attention and awareness in order to gain clarity, and we can exercise it like a muscle.
Techniques I try:
Focusing on a candle flame. Imagining a river and letting my intrusive thoughts float away in bubbles. Imagining walking down a staircase further into myself. Putting my sole focus into my breath. Various chants. Following guided meditations on apps or Youtube.
Could you incorporate a daily meditation practise somewhere in your day?
Three tiny things:
- Try out one of the meditation apps or Youtube videos and see how it makes you feel.
- Revisit your crisis kit, see if there’s any additions or subtractions you can make.
- Write a page of free-thought with “I feel” at the top of it.